domingo, 28 de septiembre de 2008

Cuento cómico, mágico, musical (la nueva generación-2a edición mejorada y aumentada) Teil 1

El hombre estudió psicoanálisis y lleva años dedicándose a él: lo enseña y lo practica en sus terapias. Llenó con las obras completas de Freud los estantes empotrados sobre las paredes de su pequeño apartamento en una elegante colonia de la Ciudad de México. Uno podía consultar allí el par de traducciones al español de dicha obra, la de Luis López Ballesteros y la de José Luis Etcheverry. El hombre prefería la primera por parecerle más castiza y elegante. El estilo mismo de Freud es elegante, por lo que había de ajustar su elección a la de Ballesteros, ni duda cabe. Sin embargo, solía consultar la versión en su idioma original para cotejar los términos y no desviarse de la letra: siempre la letra. La edición en alemán de las obras de Freud la consiguió mediante estafa y chanchullo. La víctima fue un gordo librero alemán, dueño de una añosa librería de viejo en Aquisgrán.


La estafa fue transparente, infantil, obra de pretidigitación barata, pero efectiva al cabo. El hombre convenció al librero de que le diera los dieciocho volúmenes de que se compone las Gesammelte Werke del inventor del psicoanálisis a cambio de una fotografía que el estafador tomó de una sucursal de la conocida en México “Farmacia de Dios”. El librero balbuceaba algo de español, incluso presumía haber leído algunos poemas de Jorge Manrique, de modo que al leer “Farmacia de Dios” pudo traducir mentalmente al instante: “Pharmazie des Gottes”.


Gringos y europeos, éstos más que aquéllos, suelen admirar mamarrachadas tales como los deplorables cuadros de Frida Kahlo, así como dejarse seducir por la chabacana extravagancia de algunos relatos del llamado realismo mágico latinoamericano. Cuando hablo de chabacanería no me refiero al desbordante y chocolatoso caudal barroco de las novelas de Carpentier, pero sí a las desazonadas e insípidas Macondo y anejas. Pues bien, como buen heredero del Sacro Imperio Romano Germáncio, habitante de la añosa ciudad que viera coronarse a Carlo Magno, el librero adoraba a la mediocre pintora de marras, tanto como cualquier botón de extravagancia tropical y tercermundista, de modo que la foto de la “Farmacia de Dios” le pareció una muestra inigualable de genio poético latinoamericano. El estafador no sólo no le desmintió, sino que incluso convenciolo de que la foto era en realidad composición obra de algún obscuro artista vecino de Colon Nancarrow en la Colonia las Águilas. El hombre comentó también que el artista se había inspirado en el eslógan: "la religión es el opio del pueblo", del cual dedujo el concepto de la iglesia como droguería. Desde luego que el ingenuo alemán se tragó enterito ese camello.


Nuestro hombre, pues, logró llevarse a casa dieciocho volúmenes de sabiduría psicoanalítica, y además un atractivísimo "pilón", a saber un simpático juguetito, una figura de acción de Sigmund Freud (Sigmund Freud Action Figure), en tanto que el librero se quedó con una foto que fue ocasión de fantasías maravillosas: una farmacia, localizada en una ciudad mugrosa de concreto, a su vez instalada en medio de una selva habitada por jaguares, caníbales y buenos salvajes, atendida por Tomás Moro, Francisco de Asís y el verdadero Dionisio Areopagita, pero no vendiendo, sino regalando gracia suficiente y gracia eficaz, marca Molina y marca Bánez.




Continuará...

34 comentarios:

Rocío del Mar dijo...

Lo mejor de todo es la segunda foto jajaja..
oye y a dnd puedo consultar al psicoanalista?? jajaja

RED SHOES GIRL dijo...

jajajaj yo tengo que ir.... no podría con un hombre que no se pareciera a mi papá, comprobado.

Besines

Hooligan dijo...

señor cajinas veo que a regresado de su viaje por el mundo!!! Que bueno que le invierta tiempo a su blog despues de ser utilizado por tantas mujeres !!!

Anónimo dijo...

Vaya, vaya, el gordo librero era de Colonia.. Y esa colonia de la Farmacia de Dios..¿ondes?... Coincido en lo de Frida, nunca me ha gustado su obra, más no lo que obra, mejor escrito, obraba, ah.

Julia Martín dijo...

Las mamarrachadas de Frida, jajaja... Y sí, GGM apesta, al igual que otros compadres, como diría un buen amigo: "su visión del hombre es muy jodida y me da náuseas"... Saludos

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